Budding Prima Donnas, Show-offs, etc.

Amarise · 06-16-2008, 07:19 AM

This question is directed at instructors.

We have most likely all had at least one in our teaching career. The student who is basically nice and not too obnoxious but gets an attitude after a couple of performances. She may begin to think she is better than others in the class and may even refer to newer students as something less than herself. Maybe she tries to find ways to show-off in front of the other students. Or maybe she tries to verbally express that she thinks she is really something important in a bit of a passive aggressive way to other students to show-off. Etc., etc...

Thanks for your suggestions.

Amarise

Reen.Blom · 06-16-2008, 07:27 AM

Sorry Amarise I dont have advice, just wanted to say you got a pretty website!

*hug*

Amarise · 06-16-2008, 09:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Reen.Blom

Sorry Amarise I dont have advice, just wanted to say you got a pretty website!

*hug*

Thank you for your kind compliment.

Amarise

Mosaic · 06-16-2008, 11:37 AM

Other suggestions may come your way, but maybe when you are correcting other students you can occasionally find something to correct the student, thus allowing her to see she is far from perfect. If that has been tried then I don't know, other than have a one to one talk with her. Sometimes one is forced into the one to one situation, she may get her nose in a knot for a while, but generally they come around. You can offer platitudes like 'yes you are getting there, and I am proud of the work you do and effort you make .. but..'
~Mosaic

fatinah · 06-16-2008, 12:06 PM

Im so new to bellydance and I hope I would never think I was better than I was. I had that in ballet so often people thinking they were stars of the troupe...its very annoying for fellow students so it must be a nightmare for the teachers.

Students can pick their teachers but to an extent I guess teachers cannot pick their pupils which must be a nightmare!

Shanazel · 06-16-2008, 02:54 PM

I have one right now. She is a nice woman, but is not as skilled as she'd like to think. I just correct her the same way I correct all of my students, and try not to single her out in anyway except to say, "I can tell you are very motivated to dance. That's great, but in order to successfully tackle more complicated moves, you really have to get the basics right, and right now you need to work seriously on (fill in the blank)."

Fatinah, every time I walk into a new class, I feel like it is Christmas and I am about to receive a lot of gifts. I never know what I am going to get, and part of the satisfaction of teaching involves successfully dealing with whatever students come to me. Some of these gifts I like better than others, but I have rarely had one that I simply wanted to throw back.

Aisha Azar · 06-16-2008, 03:16 PM

Dear Amarise,
I think that every now and then such students do pop up. Some of them get over it rather quickly when they realize just how much there is to learn, and that it will be a lifetime endeavour. Others seem to seem to make it their life's attitude. Most dancers that I know have gone through a little phase of it at about five years into their dance life, and then they get over it. It could be called the "teen age" phase of belly dance.
If she is doing ANYTHING whatsoever to intimidate or discourage or in any way make your other students feel badly or think less of themselves in their efforts to learn the dance, you will have to have a serious talk with her about how she affects them.
On your part, actions speak as loudly as words. You need to treat her exactly as you do any other student and not single her out in any way, hoping that she will get the point that she is one of the group. This may or may not work, depending on just how hot she thinks she is. Some people eventually go their own way, start teaching before they are ready, etc. (I had one of those about 4 years ago.) Others get the hint and settle down and realize that there will always be way too much to learn for them to get on a high horse about how good they are.
I have been fortunate in my life not to have too many dancers in my regular classes or even in workshops who act like that. Part of it is being very human and real yourself in the classroom setting so that your students understand that being the "teacher" or the "star" might be nothing more than having a few years of experience that the others in the room do not have. You never know who is going to turn out to be one incredible dancer, so you want to be careful who you act like a big shot in front of!! You might bring that up as a general thing to the whole class.
Best wishes with this.
Regards,
A'isha

lizaj · 06-16-2008, 06:13 PM

As long as a "show off" is prepared to work hard as well, they can be a winner.
Confidence isn't always counter-productive.
Of course delusion is.
I can't say I am as concerned about students as I am about some of the quality of the teachers and teaching.

fatinah · 06-16-2008, 06:20 PM

I think there is definatley some strange teachers out there...theres a certain lady a friend of mine went to once or twice and when my friend innocently asked where she learnt bellydance and where she trained as a teacher she got her head bitten off. IE she was not even technically good or experienced enough or qualified to teach...very scary!!

So far my teacher has been brilliant and I think its because she has an excellent teaching style and she is a great dancer so im lucky but I know alot of people via forums and stuff that have bad experiences.

Suheir · 06-16-2008, 06:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fatinah

I think there is definatley some strange teachers out there...theres a certain lady a friend of mine went to once or twice and when my friend innocently asked where she learnt bellydance and where she trained as a teacher she got her head bitten off. IE she was not even technically good or experienced enough or qualified to teach...very scary!!

There are plenty of those about, sadly.

06-16-2008, 07:19 AM	#1 (permalink)
Amarise Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Rockford, IL Posts: 46	Budding Prima Donnas, Show-offs, etc. This question is directed at instructors. We have most likely all had at least one in our teaching career. The student who is basically nice and not too obnoxious but gets an attitude after a couple of performances. She may begin to think she is better than others in the class and may even refer to newer students as something less than herself. Maybe she tries to find ways to show-off in front of the other students. Or maybe she tries to verbally express that she thinks she is really something important in a bit of a passive aggressive way to other students to show-off. Etc., etc... Thanks for your suggestions. Amarise __________________ http://amarisedance.com Last edited by Amarise; 07-31-2008 at 06:24 PM.

06-16-2008, 07:27 AM	#2 (permalink)
Reen.Blom V.I.P. Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Between Heaven and Earth Posts: 2,262	Sorry Amarise I dont have advice, just wanted to say you got a pretty website! hug __________________ Join WORLD BELLY DANCE DAY! www.worldbellydanceday.com

06-16-2008, 02:54 PM	#6 (permalink)
Shanazel Moderator Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Rocky Mountains USA Posts: 4,569	I have one right now. She is a nice woman, but is not as skilled as she'd like to think. I just correct her the same way I correct all of my students, and try not to single her out in anyway except to say, "I can tell you are very motivated to dance. That's great, but in order to successfully tackle more complicated moves, you really have to get the basics right, and right now you need to work seriously on (fill in the blank)." Fatinah, every time I walk into a new class, I feel like it is Christmas and I am about to receive a lot of gifts. I never know what I am going to get, and part of the satisfaction of teaching involves successfully dealing with whatever students come to me. Some of these gifts I like better than others, but I have rarely had one that I simply wanted to throw back. Last edited by Shanazel; 06-16-2008 at 02:58 PM.

06-16-2008, 03:16 PM	#7 (permalink)
Aisha Azar V.I.P. Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Pacific Northwest USA Posts: 4,462	Students, etc. Dear Amarise, I think that every now and then such students do pop up. Some of them get over it rather quickly when they realize just how much there is to learn, and that it will be a lifetime endeavour. Others seem to seem to make it their life's attitude. Most dancers that I know have gone through a little phase of it at about five years into their dance life, and then they get over it. It could be called the "teen age" phase of belly dance. If she is doing ANYTHING whatsoever to intimidate or discourage or in any way make your other students feel badly or think less of themselves in their efforts to learn the dance, you will have to have a serious talk with her about how she affects them. On your part, actions speak as loudly as words. You need to treat her exactly as you do any other student and not single her out in any way, hoping that she will get the point that she is one of the group. This may or may not work, depending on just how hot she thinks she is. Some people eventually go their own way, start teaching before they are ready, etc. (I had one of those about 4 years ago.) Others get the hint and settle down and realize that there will always be way too much to learn for them to get on a high horse about how good they are. I have been fortunate in my life not to have too many dancers in my regular classes or even in workshops who act like that. Part of it is being very human and real yourself in the classroom setting so that your students understand that being the "teacher" or the "star" might be nothing more than having a few years of experience that the others in the room do not have. You never know who is going to turn out to be one incredible dancer, so you want to be careful who you act like a big shot in front of!! You might bring that up as a general thing to the whole class. Best wishes with this. Regards, A'isha

06-16-2008, 11:37 AM	#4 (permalink)
Mosaic Moderator Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Melbourne Australia, but a Kiwi Posts: 851	Other suggestions may come your way, but maybe when you are correcting other students you can occasionally find something to correct the student, thus allowing her to see she is far from perfect. If that has been tried then I don't know, other than have a one to one talk with her. Sometimes one is forced into the one to one situation, she may get her nose in a knot for a while, but generally they come around. You can offer platitudes like 'yes you are getting there, and I am proud of the work you do and effort you make .. but..' ~Mosaic

06-16-2008, 12:06 PM	#5 (permalink)
fatinah Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Liverpool Posts: 52	Im so new to bellydance and I hope I would never think I was better than I was. I had that in ballet so often people thinking they were stars of the troupe...its very annoying for fellow students so it must be a nightmare for the teachers. Students can pick their teachers but to an extent I guess teachers cannot pick their pupils which must be a nightmare!

06-16-2008, 06:13 PM	#8 (permalink)
lizaj Moderator Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: UK Posts: 1,240	As long as a "show off" is prepared to work hard as well, they can be a winner. Confidence isn't always counter-productive. Of course delusion is. I can't say I am as concerned about students as I am about some of the quality of the teachers and teaching.

06-16-2008, 06:20 PM	#9 (permalink)
fatinah Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Liverpool Posts: 52	I think there is definatley some strange teachers out there...theres a certain lady a friend of mine went to once or twice and when my friend innocently asked where she learnt bellydance and where she trained as a teacher she got her head bitten off. IE she was not even technically good or experienced enough or qualified to teach...very scary!! So far my teacher has been brilliant and I think its because she has an excellent teaching style and she is a great dancer so im lucky but I know alot of people via forums and stuff that have bad experiences.