karena

I don't want to sound glib, but your scar is evidence of what you have given to the world, that you have created new life. That is amazing. And you should be able to wear your scar with pride. It's like stretch marks - they should be a badge of honour for all mothers. (But that does come from someone who has no such scar, nor stretch marks, (as I have given no new life to the world) so perhaps it's easy for me to say). Just a thought...

__________________
"Nothing is black and white, it's all shades of grey" Me

Farasha Hanem

Yes, I've told myself the same thing over and over and over through the years. If I had it to do all over again, I'd do it in a heartbeat, no second thoughts. If it hadn't been for the C-section almost 24 years ago now, I wouldn't have had my beautiful son, who was born on Valentine's Day, nor my beautiful daughter, now 21. My son's umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck, and he was breech. The doctor told me that my baby would have strangled to death if I'd tried to give birth to him naturally. What he didn't tell me (I found out from my mother-in-law a year and a half later) was that there was a chance that I might have died, too, because my pelvis is so small. So, yes, I've told myself many times that my scar is a "badge of honor," but even though my husband has never actually come out and said it, I think my belly's appearance is kind of a turn-off for him. That hurts.

Mosaic

Hi A'isha
I bought some power net about 6 months ago, and have not cut into it as I am not sure how you measure yourself to take into account the stretch factor. Not being the best seamstress around and a little fearful of cutting into perfectly good fabric without a pattern can you explain to this sewing challenged person how you transfer body measurements to stretchy fabric.

I have a stretchy net one which is about 6 inches wide in actuality but stretches easily to fit my size 14 body measurements. I had thought of using that as a template, but power net is different to the fishnet, and I am way too much of a scaredy cat to make the cut!

Thanks
Mosaic

Aisha Azar

Dear Karena and Farasha,
At the same time, the dance is not all about us and motherhood. The idea is to present the dance, and not our scars and stretch marks to the world. They in no way enhance the dance or make it better to observe, or dance, and often make the audience and the dancer who is flaunting them uncomfortable, therefore defeating the purpose.


Dear Mosaic,
I would probably go with the same size around as your average dance leotard for class would be. Either go and buy a cheap leo, wear it for awhile and use that measurement, or use the measurement on one that you already have that is getting a bit worn out. Powernet fits a bit tighter than lycra.
Oh, and BTW, I have read a lot of stuff that says not to put them in the washer and dryer. I do that all the time and mine last for literally years.
Regards,
A'isha
Regards,
A'isha

Shanazel

I believe dance and art serve humanity, humanity does not serve them. The point being made here that is people, audiences and performers alike, are way too hung up on personal appearance, and if we'd get past focussing attention on physical defects and physical perfection, both humanity and the dance would perhaps be better served.

Mosaic

Thanks for the idea A'isha - runs off to get out the comfortable leotard

Aisha Azar

Dear Shanazel,
In every country in the world, personal appearance means something. I can not think of any culture anywhere, where the flaunting of stretch marks serves humanity. And while I also believe that art and dance are there to provide a service to humanity, I think there is also such a thing as doing as much justice as possible to the spirit of the art form one chooses to become involved in. If belly dance were specifically about motherhood, then stretch marks just might have a place on the stage, but it is not. As I said before, stretch marks do not in any way enhance the dance form.


Dear Mosaic,
I hope it all works out just right!

Regards to you both,
A'isha

sedoniaraqs

Hi Farasha:

I'm not sure if any of the replies really covered your original question about just pulling a skirt or harem pants up to your waist rather than the hips as these were meant to go. I don't think that would work very well. To me this is the belly dance version of "nerdy". Samia Gamal's Afrita Hanem costume notwithstanding. The problem is not that one must show the navel, but rather that some costumes were meant to emphasize the widest line of the hips; you can't just take one of these kinds of costumes and pull them up to your waist.

As others have pointed out, a mesh body might solve your problem. If you still don't like the way your scar looks with a mesh body, you might try dotting it all over with sequins or rhinestones to provide more camouflage.

If this doesn't work, choose costumes that are designed to cover the lower tummy, such as a non-sheer dress or one of those dresses with a skirt that comes up to a point in the center (though I think those do not flatter all figure types, especially short torsos).

There are plenty of costume choices out there such that everyone can find something that works for them.

Sedonia

sedoniaraqs

You can get several weights of mesh and powernet here:
Fabric Depot Home - Specializing in Lycras and Tricots

The lighter weight mesh comes in a kajillion colors and is similar to the lightweight mesh that sugarpetals uses.

IMO, Hancocks, JoAnn, Hobby Lobby, etc. rarely have any fabric worthy of a dance costume. They cater to people making quilts and crafts, and fashion sewers who are making their kids' halloween costumes or otherwise don't have a taste for fine fabrics.

Sedonia

Shanazel

Dear A'isha,

How did you get from "if we'd get past focussing attention on physical defects and physical perfection, both humanity and the dance would perhaps be better served" to "flaunting of stretchmarks serves humanity?"

Just curious.

Shanazel