Aisha Azar

Dear Gang,
My best friend is a "Woman of the Holy Kingdom", and she has both good and bad things to say.

Re university graduates- She is a business degree from a prestigious university in Saudi. The classrooms are segregated and often the girls do not have a teacher in the classroom if he is male, but he is televised to the females. Probably the opposite is true for men.

Re husbands keeping the children if there is a divorce- This is an Islamic mandate and true in any Islamic country or in any Islamic relationship for that matter. Usually the younger kids stay with their mothers anyway, but they do belong legally to their father. It was the same way here in the U.S. until pretty recently. In Victorian times, here, women had even less rights than Saudi women, who are allowed to at least own their own property and buy and sell without male interference..... in religious theory anyway...


In my own experience, I find that many wealthy and even middle class Saudi women are pretty spoiled on a lot of levels. They can't drive, but have a driver, any time day or night at the beck and call. One time I was staying in the Seattle area at the home of one of the Saudi guys who is vaguely related to the royal family. He had to stay up all night entertaining this prince from Qatar and he got to bed about 7 AM. His sister called at 9 AM and told him she needed to go and register for her French lesson, would he come and take her. Since it is HIS responsibility to see that she gets what she needs and she needed a ride, he went. I have witnessed a lot of this kind of behavior in Saudi families. I have even benefited from it myself. When in the company of Saudi males, I have never been allowed to pay for so much as a candy bar. They consider it their responsibility to take care of females.


Re medical treatment- It is truly hideous that women can not access their own medical care. It is every bit as hideous here in the United States. My daughter is too poor to afford some surgery she desperately needs and will probably have to wait until she is in dire emergent need before the state will give her some half hearted care. Last time they made her wait, she had to have 3 feet of her intestine removed, so its not some little thing I am talking about. Her father and I are also not wealthy enough to pay out of pocket for her medical needs. I see no difference in the ugliness of the two situations.


Saudi society has its own sets of problems, not the least being extremely high unemployment so that people who never had to work before are now going out to get menial jobs. the government is trying to go through a process called "Saudi-ization" in English, in which they are trying to make sure their people become more self-sufficient and are trying to get rid of a lot of expatriate workers. (I forget the Arab term for it. A couple of years ago I helped a Saudi guy get his thesis in order and cleaned up, and this process was the subject of his Master's thesis.) In the process, women are getting more jobs, but they pay hell a lot of times. For example, women who work in banks or other situations where they work with male colleagues are often gossiped about in horrible ways and and their reputations are ruined.

Medical fields seem to be somewhat more advance. I had a friend who is gone back home now and she has worked int he medical field for most of her adult life. She wanted to become an administrator and her husband, who is a true Muslim and believes in women's right to work and be educated as the Prophet Mohamed (Peace be on him) mandated. He took care of the kids after his degree was finished in order that she could get hers, though he really wanted to go home and start his own business.

Anyway, good and bad everywhere you go.
Regards,
A'isha